I feel sorry for men

I really do.

My dh is a wonderful man, who loves his family dearly. He cherishes his children, plays with them, spends amazing amounts of time with them, and is basically just an all-around terrific dad.

And yet, in spite of all of that, it seems that God doesn't bless him, or other men, with that "babymoon" period.

You know what I'm talking about.

It's that phase, in spite of all the complications of the recovery process, in which a mom just drinks in every feature of her new baby.

How can they just not experience it?

Case in point--

me: Honey, isn't she the most beautiful baby you've ever seen?
dh: Yeah.
me: I'm serious! I mean, just LOOK at her!
dh: I know... she's a cute baby.
me: She's not just "cute" -- she's beautiful! Look at her eyes!
dh: um-hmmm.
me: They merit a whole lot more than just an "um-hmmm."
dh: [smiles sweetly] Yes, she has beautiful eyes.
me: [pause] Are you patronizing me?
dh: What?
me: Are you patronizing me? You didn't sound very sincere.
dh: Of course I mean it!
me: yeah, right....

[time passes]

me: Doesn't she just smell good?
dh: What???
me: Doesn't the smell of her just make you want to melt?
dh: um, no.
me: NO???
dh: You don't want me to lie, do you?
me: How can you not love the way she smells?
dh: I don't know... she's just a baby.
me: JUST a baby? I don't think you're trying hard enough. Here, smell her...
dh: No! I don't want to smell her!
me: Here (putting baby's head to dh's nose). Doesn't she smell heavenly?
dh: I can't smell a thing.
me: Oh COME ON!
dh: No, I'm serious.
me: She smells a lot like Kathryn did... with maybe a little bit of Thomas thrown in.
dh: How on earth do you remember that?
me: Don't you?
dh: No!
me: That's just so sad....

I'm being facetious, of course, but you get the point. I bet you've all had those same sorts of conversations with your own husbands!

My kids, at least, are enjoying the babymoon with me.

No joke. You would think that there might possibly be some jealousy issues, but there aren't. THEY sit around staring at her and telling me how beautiful/wonderful/perfect she is, and that they can't imagine a better baby.

God bless them!

Kimberly Hahn says several times in her book, Life Giving Love..., that the best gift I can give my children is siblings. I believe that is true (although I think "Loving their Daddy" ranks first). I am watching my kids love their new baby sister sacrificially and joyfully, being thrilled every moment over her presence in our lives. They "ooh and ahh" over her, making sure that all of her needs are taken care of (and many that I'm sure she never thought of!). They "call turns" over who gets to hold her next -- regardless of whether she is crying or not.

So as I type this with her snuggled against my chest, breathing in the delicious Pampers/diaper wipes/normal Grace smell and hearing her light snoring noises as she falls asleep on me, just know that I am in heaven...

Yeah, I could go for number 8.

Sorry...

...for the light blogging as of late. They say "real life trumps blogging life," and I must say this is true.

I have been battling a low-grade fever for many days now, which resulted in getting my little you-know-what trotted over to the ER this afternoon (much to my great dismay). After many tests, they could not tell me what I *do* have... only what I don't.

So, I wait until Tuesday when I can talk to my regular doctor, and see what is going on.

Please pray for me. This is the last week that I will have help, and I need to get back on my feet quickly. (no, I'm not going to purposely RUSH anything, but... well, you know what I mean).

For the record: although the ER trip was not "fun," my dh and I had the best time together. He is hysterically funny, and we were both laughing so hard, I'm sure the rest of the staff were wondering what the HECK was so funny in exam room 1!

All Saints' Day party

Last evening we had our parish's first All Saints' Day party. The kids were very excited about going, but unfortunately, I was NOT going to be able to sew anything new for them... so it was an interesting experiment to see exactly HOW we could make them into the saints they had chosen, simply with the materials we already had here in the house.

Sean decided he was going to be St. Paul...


Reilly wanted to go as Blessed Kateri Tekakwitha...


Kathryn has always said St. Rose was her favorite...


But what do you do with a 4-yr old, who insists on being a dragon?


Simple. You let him be part of his brother's St. Michael costume "ensemble," and suddenly it all makes sense...


(Sean, always the stickler for the rules, said, "So basically you're letting Thomas dress up as Satan for the All Saints' Day party?".... OK, technically I did, but it kept the peace, was a really cute "two for one" costume, and spared me a lot of grief and heartache...)

Busy...

... working on All Saints' Day costumes for the kids for the party tonight. Pictures will be forthcoming!

Blogger is working!

Make sure to check out the three new posts below! Lots of pictures!

Let's not forget those who made it all possible!

Surviving this past week, that is!

The awards have to go out to my husband, my mom, and my dad.




For every meal cooked (especially Dad with his "chef's egg surprise" for breakfast... the surprise being, of course, that there *is* no egg...), dish washed, child bathed, load of laundry done (how did you keep up with all of it, Mom?), carpet vacuumed, and late night pharmacy run made, I say

THANK YOU!!!

They took care of everything, so I didn't try to overdo it and delay the healing process. They ran all the errands that needed to be done, from late night milk runs to getting art supplies and taking the kids to art and cello lessons.

Included in there also was all the extra time they took to make sure the other kids weren't forgotten. They spent time reading, playing, drawing, taking walks, and just snuggling and *listening* to the kids, so that they didn't feel like they were being totally ignored during this big change in our family's life.

I could NOT have made it through this week without you.

Honey, I love you with all my heart.

Mom and Dad, thank you for taking almost two weeks -- putting your lives on hold -- so that you could help me when I needed you the most.

And for my kids, y'all just rock. I couldn't ask for a better family than you!


I wil compose another "thank you ode" to my mother-in-law, who has graciously come to stay with us this week. As we speak, she and my husband are driving to the Apple Farm for an afternoon of apple picking, hay rides, corn mazes, and farm fun. God bless her for jumping in and doing what I can't do right now! I love you, Jeannie!

Birthdays in pictures

Sweet, sweet kids that they are (especially Kathryn, who just turned seven and therefore knew what she was missing), the birthday kids this week graciously accepted a VERY toned down birthday celebration, understanding that Mommy couldn't do much this year, and the big "present" for us all was the birth of Grace.

Still, I want to honor them and tell the world how much I love them!

Monday was Kathryn's birthday and, as I mentioned, she turned seven. Unbelievably understanding and generous, she did not complain ONCE about not having a party that she could invite her friends to. This is all the more amazing when I tell you that she and her big sister have been designing birthday invitations for MONTHS beforehand. (You better believe I'm going to try to do something special and wonderful for her when I am fully recovered!)

I love you, sweetheart, and I am so proud of you!




The next day (Tuesday) brought us Thomas' birthday! I can't believe he's FOUR already. Where did the time go? Just yesterday, it seems, I was bringing him home from the hospital and now here he is, all "grown up" and being a fantastic big brother to his two younger sisters. I'm just so thankful he's not "too big" for a late night snuggle -- that's when he curls up next to me, puts his hands on my cheeks, gives me a sweet little kiss, and whispers:

"I don't ever want to be wifout you, Mommy."

I don't ever want to be without you either, baby. You are one of the more "strong willed" children we have, but you make every day fun!




And finally, yesterday (Saturday) brought us Marie's second birthday. By the time her turn rolled around, she knew exactly what to do with those birthday candles! (yeah, I know it LOOKS like three candles, but it's actually two sparklers and then a bonus singing candle... it doesn't actually count)

This whole new baby thing has obviously hit Marie the hardest. She has been my baby for two years, and now having to give up that position is a bit unsettling... but I will say that she's handled it like a trouper. *I* miss holding her and rocking her, and I look forward to the day when I can swoop her up in my arms again and give her all the attention she deserves. Until then, I can only pray that the little things I am able to do still speak to her and let her know how deeply loved she is.

So here's to you, sweetheart. You are funny, full of life, stubborn (too true), amazingly perceptive of other people's feelings, a great cleaner (she's been taking her dishes to the dishwasher since she could walk!), and a total joy. You rock!

Cute baby moment

Oh yeah, I'm in love...



(it has been SO HARD to get a decent picture of her! For one, she barely stops moving and secondly, the camera we've got seems to "flatten" out her features, so my really rather thin baby comes out looking chunky in every picture! My dad's camera took great pictures of her, but unfortunately I don't have any of those...)

A week in review

hmmmmm.

Blogger seems to be having great difficulty this evening. I was hoping to finally sit down (while nursing) and upload some pictures but, alas, twas not meant to be.

I will say though that it's been a busy week... THREE birthdays (Kathryn's, Thomas', and finally Marie's today.), some homeschooling, a doctor's visit for Grace, and me not being able to do much of anything. I hate sitting down when there's work to be done, and I usually try to rush the healing process and wind up hurting myself; this week I behaved and did what I was supposed to do -- no lifting, no driving, no cleaning, etc etc etc. (do you know how difficult that is when the kitchen floor needs to be swept??) My parents and husband (and kids too, to some extent) jumped in and did everything that needed to be done, and I am so thankful. They have made recovery a heck of a lot easier.

What this week *did* provide for me (other than the wonderful opportunity to spend time with my parents, whom I miss terribly) was the time to talk to my kids, bond like crazy with our new little one, and do crafts (ones that I can put down at a moment's notice when a certain sweet little girl needs her Mommy)

Tomorrow my family will be going to an apple orchard and doing all sorts of fun activities -- picking apples and pumpkins, visiting a farm, going on a hayride, and learning about beekeeping. I wish Grace and I could go, but I know that an all-afternoon activity like that would be too much right now.

rats.

Oh well, we'll just have to have Daddy take LOTS of pictures, and we'll count it all as a homeschooling field trip!

Hopefully blogger will cooperate with me tomorrow, and I'll be able to post the pictures I was planning on posting tonight.


Final update: When the Lord answers prayer, He does so beautifully. Not even a single whisper of a panic attack since I got my rose. Thank You, Lord... and thank you, St. Therese, for your prayers.

Answers to prayer

Prayer whispered yesterday evening:

"St. Therese, please pray for me that these panic attacks will go away."


Guess what just started blooming on my rose bush this morning...



Bear in mind that this particular bush hasn't had any roses on it in, oh, several months now...


(excuse the bad picture. I had to take it in the dark!)

Thank you

...for all the comments (both here and in "real life"), prayers, and helpful suggestions. It truly means the world to me to know that y'all are PRAYING for me... that in the middle of all of this, the Holy Spirit is prompting someone to pray -- "Pray for Ouiz right now. She really needs it."

Thank you, one and all.

On the good side, perhaps this will establish a daily Rosary routine for me once and for all! I found that during the early morning hours, as that panic feeling rose once again, that the repetitive prayers of the Rosary were incredibly helpful... to remember that I was asking a mighty powerful prayer warrior (and fellow Mom) to pray for me... to say the name of Jesus over and over again... and to force my mind to quit wandering and FOCUS on what I was saying... all of that helped squelch this morning's attack, and enabled me to go to sleep.


I will still state for the record that she is WORTH EVERY BIT of this. I look into her little face, and see this beautiful child that the Lord has given to us, and I'm just blown away by it all. I am awed and humbled by this blessing, and by her presence here.

Thank You, Jesus, for the gift of Grace.

Panic attack, part 2

Yes, I am still dealing with this, and in fact spent most of the evening crying, praying, and running outside in an effort to not feel so "closed in."

Get this -- I couldn't even take a drink from a glass, because my face felt too "confined." (yes, I had to drink through a straw)

I know that panic attacks are common, but that doesn't stop me from feeling like an absolute freak at this moment.

I called the doctor and he prescribed some medicine for me, but after reading all the warnings that came with it, I opted to just put that on the counter for now.

Anyone ever used Ativan?

I'm back!

Before...


...and after.

Grace was born on Thursday, October 11th, at 2:10 PM. She weighed in at 7 lbs 1 oz and was 20 inches long.

Welcome to the world, sweetheart!



I would like to thank each and every one of you who prayed for me. I can honestly say that this was the easiest c-section BY FAR that I've ever had. (Do you think this is the Lord's way of making me willing to go through it again? hmmmmm)

There was only one downer, but it was a biggie.

I had a panic attack.

If you've ever had one, you know how terrifying they can be. If not, you'll just have to take my word for it.

I was completely fine until later on in the evening when they tried to put cuffs on my legs to prevent blood clots. For some reason, that was all it took. I was overwhelmed with feelings of intense (and I do mean INTENSE) claustrophobia, and it was all I could do to keep from crawling off that bed and down four flights of stairs to get to some fresh air outside. I had to fight the panic with everything I had, because my children were in the room with me at the time, and they didn't need to see their Mommy completely lose it. I was praying out loud, begging the Lord to help me, and asking St. Therese and St. Pio to intercede for me as well. I called my friend Malia and she prayed for me over the phone as well.

The prayers helped.

I still struggled, but I was able to get control and stay sane.

Needless to say, dh stayed with me that evening (hence the lack of pictures!) and left to go home only when he was sure that I was going to be OK.

Here's the funny part... just take a look at the room that I managed to feel claustrophobic in! Could I possibly have gotten a bigger room? I don't think so!



While I will never know for sure why I went through that particular episode, I can say that the nurse who took care of me during my panic attack was wonderful, and we were able to have several good conversations and share a bit of our "spiritual journey" with each other. She is a devout Christian who left the Catholic Church years ago, and I am a Christian returning to the Catholic faith. May God bless us both by the conversations that we had!

Thank you again for all the prayers and sacrifices you offered up for me. This tired Mommy needed every bit of them!

One final "hurrah"

All the pregnant women in our Bible study! (Many thanks to Amber for the pictures).

Well, It's almost 8:30 AM here, and I'll be leaving in about an hour to drive to the hospital. I am so thankful for all of you out there praying for me as I battle the inevitable nervousness! I'll be in the OR by 1:00 PM, and by 2:30 PM they should be wheeling me back into my room.

I'll ask my husband to try and post some pictures of Grace either when he gets home later this evening or sometime tomorrow.

God bless you all!

Panic is now setting in

...as I realize all that I have left to do. Why do so many things sneak up on us last minute?

I thank all of you for your prayers. I will be relying heavily on knowing I'm being prayed for when they wheel me into the operating room on Thursday!

Nesting again

Whew! It's been a whirlwind of activity around here as we are in the last few days before Grace arrives!

Top item: New van has arrived! Let's all shout a huge PRAISE GOD for that one! I am thankful to have it, but now I have to learn how to drive this monstrous machine I get to shuttle my children around in. I took a few practice runs around town -- not too bad, as long as I don't have to actually STOP anywhere. There is NO WAY I can park a 15-passenger van in a parking space without hitting every car in my immediate vicinity. If anyone would like to send me some pointers (such as you, Suburban Cowgirl), I would greatly appreciate it.

Next item: Medical "crisis" averted. Won't go into details on this one, but I was a basket case. Trust me. The doctor (God bless him!) took pity on me and prescribed medicine for my kids as a preventative measure. He has surely taken many years off of Purgatory for that one!

Marie finally moved into the girls' room. Yet another HUGE PRAISE GOD for that. She is having a blast being in there with her big sisters, and they really seem to enjoy taking care of her. We're thrilled to finally be back in our bedroom, so it looks like everyone wins on this one!

Other items taken care of:
Baby items taken out of the attic: check

Swing, bouncy seat, crib, etc. in pieces on the floor at this moment: check

Attic cleaned out (by sweet dh) in an effort to get everything organized: check

Girls' clothes gone through, sorted, and prepared for fall: check

Baby clothes/crib stuff washed: check

Most of the girl baby clothes MISSING: check
(don't ask me... seriously. I have absolutely NO IDEA where all of my newborn girl sleepers are. As this is girl #4, we've accumulated quite a bit. It is NOT in the attic, and I didn't loan them out to anyone that I can recall. Needless to say, I am NOT happy over the prospect of buying new sleepers, but there it is... unless St. Anthony intercedes and we find them.)


Still to do:
--go through boys' stuff
--get rid of the millions of shoes that don't fit anyone anymore
--put together the above-mentioned baby items
--get ready for my parents, who are coming in Tuesday morning
--pack
--panic (eek!)
--finish paperwork on van, get insurance, etc
--breathe
--get some fun books to read in the hospital
--panic some more

And the list goes on.


It's amazing that someone so small can require so much in the way of "prep time"!

Still, I am thankful for the chance to do it all again, and if all goes well (God willing!) I will be sitting in my hospital bed on Thursday night, singing "Happy Birthday" to a sweet little newborn -- counting fingers and toes, getting to know her face, her cry, and her smell -- and thanking the Lord for yet another blessing to our family.

(We won't dwell too much on what's going to happen Friday, though. That won't be fun... the initial getting out of bed, trying to walk without hurting myself too badly, etc. I hate that part. *grin* Perhaps that will be a mighty good time to start offering up prayers for others who are suffering...)

Sean's 10 today!

Ten years ago today, I was a terrified new mom...

I had just given birth (emergency c-section) to this teeny little guy... all 2 lbs 14 oz of him.

(all you "abortion rights" folks out there, take note -- THIS is what a child at 30 weeks looks like!)




With a head barely the size of my husband's beeper, and feeding tubes and IVs stuck in him, he looked so small and helpless.

We made the hour long trek every day to the hospital, to sit in the NICU with all the other parents of preemies. We got used to the sights and sounds of the NICU, and learned how to read the monitors, how NOT to freak out every time an alarm went off, and how to take care of this little guy.

50 days later, he was finally able to leave the NICU -- all 3 1/2 lbs of him. He was still on a heart monitor, and we had to give him caffeine every morning to ensure that he would be OK, but basically he was a very healthy (albeit small) little boy.

And now, ten years later, here he is..



We are so blessed.

Happy birthday, sweetheart! We love you!

Fall Crafts

Well, I had high hopes of getting an early start on the more difficult subjects this morning, and then concentrating on crafts later on this afternoon, when Marie was sound asleep.

No dice.

As soon as the kids saw the acorn person I made last night, they were "all over it like white on rice," as they say here.

Several bloggers have already done this project, so I can't credit everyone I've seen, because I honestly don't remember! However, I believe I first saw these from Katherine over at Life in the Onion Dome and Alice Cantrell over at A Number of Things.




Here's the prototype I made last night. I used white stitches so the kids could see how to sew the clothes, should they decide to go that route (they didn't... they all opted for the hot glue approach).




Here are the basic supplies I used -- felt, pipe cleaners, wooden beads, and various "found" objects from outside (acorns, moss, leaves, etc)




I showed the kids how to get the basic body shape and slip the beads on the top for the head.


And then off we went! We spent the next hour designing, cutting, gluing, and having a lot of fun. (Since we used hot glue, I was in charge of that.) After that they were in charge of hair selection and "embellishments." And here are the results!



They have spent the rest of the morning building houses for the town of "Woodland" out of blocks and Lincoln logs. While we haven't gotten much "serious" schooling done today, I still feel like we've already accomplished quite a bit!

Our weekend in pictures

Feast of the Archangels.
We made a devil's food cake, and then we stabbed it with little plastic swords! (goofy, for sure, but my kids love doing this, and what better way to talk about St. Michael battling Satan?)



My girls decided to rake the front yard... for fun!
(God bless them!!!)





High fashion for the 23-month old in your family -- the chicken hat!



Brave, braver, bravest.
(My husband was under the house spreading lime to speed up the "drying up process" of the big puddle we had under the house -- courtesy of last week's plumbing mishap. For some reason, a dark, enclosed space that smells like mildew and is filled with crickets and spiders actually DRAWS little boys in!)



The girls have been working very hard on finishing their very first handmade rosaries! Ta-da! They were both so very proud of the work they did!