He still keeps me laughing

I got back to the car after making the standard "newspapers and doughnuts" run through the grocery store. I was tired after holding the baby at Mass/Sunday School for over two hours, and I was ready to get home.

As I was reaching out to open my door, I saw my husband taking Grace out of the car.

He looked at me with sympathy, and then said, "I'm so sorry, but Grace really has to go to the bathroom."

Ugh. Going back in there was the LAST thing I wanted to do... especially since she had taken her shoes off, and I was going to have to carry her all the way to the back of the store.

As I was walking away my husband called out across the parking lot cheerily:

"Offer it up!.... Offer it up for all those who are incontinent!"

Needless to say, I laughed all the way to the back of the store.

It pays to homeschool!

So I don't miss moments like this...

Christopher was sitting at the table, working on his math lesson, when he put his pencil down, looked at me like he had been really pondering something special, and then said --

"Ya know, Mom, if I had a pet dung beetle, I'd think Sisyphus would be a good name for him."

[it took me several minutes before I could stop laughing....]

Overheard at our house

In the "well, THAT'S good news!" department:

Thomas: You know what, Mommy?
Me: What, sweetie?
Thomas: Even if someone double dared me, I would NEVER jump into a giant food processor.

In the "I don't think she's catching on" department:

Grace: Mommy! My old boo-boo's gone!
Me: See? I told you it would go away! Your body made new skin!
Grace: [crying] Now I need to get a new one!

Another Christopher-ism

[While teaching Christopher and Thomas about The Prodigal Son]

Me: "And so the younger son spent all his money, and he became very poor. Eventually, he found a job herding pigs..."

Christopher: [totally shocked] "You mean you can actually get a job HURTING pigs?"


Just another reason why I homeschool, folks... I would hate to miss out on moments like these!

I'm not kidding

Do your kids play with ice?

Yeah, mine do, too.

Most of them simply eat it... or freeze toys in blocks of ice for the sheer joy of chipping them out later.

Thomas, however, has taken it to an art form. For the past three days he has been tending to his "pet ice."

I kid you not.

In fact, just a few minutes ago we heard him shout from the back:

"Daddy! Guess what my pet ice and I are doing right now! We're playing chess!"

And here's the proof:

Bless his heart. We really do give him more toys to play with than that! *grin*

Speaking of chess, though, I have to brag on Thomas for a minute. This six-year old TAUGHT HIMSELF CHESS just by watching others after one day. He knows where each of the pieces go, how they move, and the basics of the game. DH played with him this morning and he was in heaven!

Out of the mouths of babes

Marie (age 3), reciting the Hail Mary:

"...Holy Mary, Mother of God, PLAY with us sinners, now and at the hour of our death, Amen."

Thought for the morning

You know, we can all wax poetic about the glorious vocation of motherhood, and find all sorts of deep spiritual lessons from the activities of the day, but this morning I can't stop laughing at the thought that *MY* personal path to holiness -- lovingly planned and hand picked by God Himself -- is peppered with such questions as:

"What did you just eat off the floor?"

"What the heck is that smell?" and

"Why are the Rice Krispies in the bathroom?"

[those are three questions I've asked within the past hour, by the way]

It's all a matter of perspective

In a conversation with Christopher this evening...

C: Are you ever going to have any more babies?

Me: Well honey, that's something that Jesus is going to have to decide.

C: I'm not sure I want to have any more.

Me: Really? Why?

C: Well, I love my brothers and sisters and everything... and I'm glad we're all here... but if you have too many more... well, we might have a BIG family then...

Life in a Catholic home

Overheard at the kitchen table this morning:

Sean to Christopher:
I've got lasers that can shoot through any armor! You can't escape!

Kathryn:
No... I'm St. Martin de Porres and all I have to do is touch him and he'll be healed again!


[while this book doesn't necessarily have lasers in it, it has obviously been quite useful in teaching the kids about St. Martin de Porres!]



And isn't that part of the reason we all chose to homeschool? So that we could pass on the Faith to our children? I love that it's defining who they are, and seeping down even into their imaginations.



Here's another bit I wanted to share. I've had it by my computer for weeks now, and this seems as good a time as any to share it. This is what Christopher sat down and wrote at the kitchen table one day (I'd take a picture of it, but then I'd be sharing their real names....)

"I love Thomas from Christopher.
Wot I love obawt (about) Thomas
He is a grat (great)
boy
I love him olot (a lot)
bot (but) mi favrit (my favorite) prt obowt (part about) Thomas is himself."

THAT thrills my heart!

Things I NEVER thought I'd say...

"Christopher, quit flushing burps down the toilet!"


[Yes, that was uttered by me and yes, I was serious. He has been doing this all day long... running into the bathroom, burping into the bowl, and flushing, much to the hilarious amusement of his siblings.]

Unbelievable!

Now that you mention it, I guess He is... prompt...

After Christopher and I finished up our catechism lesson for the day, I joked around with him and said, "Homeschooling is ended. You may go in peace to love and serve the Lord." [for non-Catholics: this is how each Mass is ended] And then I added:

"Thanks be to God." [the standard response]

Christopher just looked at me and said, "what?"

"Thanks be to God."

With that, he smiled and said, "OH! Is THAT what it is? I was wondering why we were calling Him 'speedy'!"

[think about that one a moment, people...

Thanks BE to God, vs. Thanks, speedy God!]

My poor child has been thanking "speedy God" every Sunday for FIVE YEARS!


Oh my goodness, I was CRYING laughing. I couldn't help it. I told him I was sorry and that I wasn't making fun of him, but that was just too funny. He started laughing and said, "That's OK, Mommy. You can laugh. It IS pretty funny..."

I simply cannot forget this one

Christopher sat down at the table with the younger ones (Thomas and Marie) to eat lunch while I continued to homeschool the older kids in the other room. He shouted out, "But Mommy, we didn't pray for the food!"

"Christopher, why don't you pray for the table, and then you can start eating."

And so he did.

Everyone bowed their heads and made the sign of the Cross, and then Christopher began:

"Father, thank you for the wheat, which was used to make this bread. And thank you for.... um....

C: Hey Mommy!
M: What?

C: What did God do to make the pepperoni?
M: Well, He gave us the animals, I suppose...

C: OK, thank You, God, for the animals that we used to make the pepperoni and... well... well... we don't know what You did to make the cheese, but we'll understand it all in Heaven one day. Amen"

A much needed ego boost

Thomas: Mommy, you never have to worry about the robbers coming to take you away.

Me: No, sweetie... I don't need to worry about robbers stealing me.

Thomas: Dat's wight, 'cause you're too heavy to carry.

What did you say??

During our review of catechism questions this morning...

Me: "So Reilly, God is what?"
Reilly: "Eternal."
Kathryn: "Did you just say nocturnal?"
Reilly: [laughing] "No! I said E-ternal!"
Kathryn: "Oh... because, that would be REALLY funny to think that God only comes out at night..."

More words of wisdom...

...from Christopher (who just spouts these things out on a daily basis)

C: "Mommy, rhinoceroses don't have thumbs."
Me: "No, Christopher, they don't."
C: "I betcha that's why they can't climb trees."

Thank you, Malia!

My friend just reminded me of another "Christopherism," which I just have to quote from the comments section:

And now one of my remembrances for the Christopher archive. One day when he was two he was looking into your fish tank and said, "Mommy, I would not eat those fish."

You replied, "Why not, Christopher?"

"Because," he said, "they are still moving."

Happy Birthday to Christopher, friend to fish and worms alike!

Thank you, Malia... for remembering this one -- I can't believe I had forgotten it!

My own little Stephen Wright

Christopher, talking to Thomas in the car:

"You have to be careful when you get on the top bunk. In fact, I remember when I fell off the top bunk and landed on my head...

...oh wait a minute, that wasn't ME.... That was YOU."

Don't have time for a real post

So I'll leave you with two actual, honest-to-goodness sentences heard here today. The first one I overheard as Thomas and Christopher were at the kitchen table, snacking...

T: Christopher, wet's eat some more chips, and then we can pway the "watch out for the throw-up" game!

(Yes, I was horrified and no, as far as I know, this game has never actually BEEN played at my home but, well, you never know...)

And the second comment was actually a question that Christopher asked me:

"Mommy, is it OK if someone eats a dog on purpose?"

(OK, again I'm wondering what's going on behind my back. I thought I had a pretty firm grasp of what's going on around here, but I'm beginning to have my doubts...)

This is what passes for entertainment around here

"Hello, my name is Marie, and I pitched a fit until my Daddy put this on my forehead. After that, I was one happy little camper."



"See? Don't I look cool? Don't I look happy?"



"It fell off!
Why aren't you putting it back on me?
Why are you laughing at me? Stop it!
I don't laugh at you!"



"Fine, then... I'll figure out how to put it on myself."



And words I never thought I would hear:

"Look, Mommy! Christopher is an angler fish!!"