Friday, August 29, 2008

I am thrilled to report

that I DID get the extra grace I needed yesterday, so thank you to one and all who prayed for me!

I had a vivid mental image pop into my head a few months ago, when confronted with something that I really didn't want to do, and yet needed to do. It was from the Garden scene in THE PASSION, where Jesus bends His head to the ground in submission to His Father's will. That picture of Him bowed down was frozen on the "screen" in my brain, and the word "submit" came through so clearly.

Submit.

"Lord, I don't want to hold a crying baby all day long!"
I know. Submit.

"But I really, reeeeeeeeealllly want just a few minutes in front of the computer by myself! I don't want to listen to Thomas ramble on with whatever story he's regaling me with now!"
It wasn't easy for Me either. Submit.

"OK, OK, but come ooooooooooooooooon. I don't waaaaaana play Little People with Marie! Pul-lee-hee-heese! I'd rather eat a roach... seriously... don't make me do this...."
Submit.

And on and on the dialogue goes. Over and over again, I whine and complain about all I'm called to do, and over and over again I get "thunked" on the head and reminded that (surprise surprise) it isn't all about me.

"Present your bodies as living sacrifices..."

"Submit..."


Once I let go of whatever "right" I'm gripping onto so tightly-- be it computer time, a hot lunch, a few minutes of quiet so I can read, or the chance to fold laundry without a little one hanging onto my skirt (and lest anyone think I'm claiming great holiness here, let me just put that one to bed right now. I'm talking MICRO-STEPS in the right direction) -- I find that the anger disappears, and I'm able to do the task with a much better attitude.

So, as you might guess, I was hit with quite a few "submits" yesterday, and once I made the tiniest move in the right direction, I was carried the rest of the way by an amazing God who can handle all the trials and worries of this life without any trouble.


3 comments:

Suburban Cowgirl said...

Ouiz -
You are amazing. Seriously. I am always encouraged by your posts about your struggles to grow in holiness. I feel your pain. I live your pain.

And I rejoice with you!

{hugs}
Cowgirl

Ouiz said...

I know you live it too!

I soooooooooooooo wish you still lived closer together so we could hash out some of our "life lessons" over an iced coffee!

Beth said...

I got hit with that reading this morning too!! Thanks for sharing this?