Thursday, August 28, 2008

Needing an extra dose of grace today

Yuck. It's been one of those days. One of those weeks, actually. I am struggling mightily to keep my words in check, not to give in to despair/fear/jealousy, and trying to keep my house from completely falling apart.

In other words, I need the Lord's help in a big, big way.

I can feel it all creeping in, and I'm reminded that THIS is when I need to ask Him for help and to TRUST that He's taking care of everything that needs taking care of.

All of my fears for my health, our finances, and our children's futures are in His hands. He knows what we need, and He is fully capable of taking care of us.

I can turn to Him with all my wounded feelings, petty jealousies, and irritations of the day.

The second reading for this upcoming Sunday is from Romans 12 (verses 1 and 2) where we are instructed to present our bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God... and to be transformed by the renewing of our minds. It is not *fun* to be a sacrifice. This is just my paraphrase, of course, but I am to offer up all of what I consider to be "the best" of me -- my health, my dreams, my desires. All of it. And I need to ask Him to help me see things as He sees them, not the way I do.

I am also to offer up myself in service to my children. It is not *fun* to carry a cranky, germ-infested, mucous-covered 10 month old who has no idea WHAT she wants, but what you're giving her at the moment IS JUST NOT IT. Carrying her around in love, offering my service to her as service to Jesus, is another way to live out our Faith.

So, the struggle of the day begins.

I am thrilled to know that St. Therese, one of my all-time favorite saints (and one who is hearing quite a few prayers for intercession at this moment!) stressed the idea of the little way -- the little sacrifices, the little acts of love. I can't do anything big right now, but perhaps the small ones today will achieve a greater good for my soul than I can ever imagine.

And with that, I will get up from this chair, pick up this incredibly fussy baby, and start my homeschooling day.

7 comments:

Alice Gunther said...

Praying for you very much!

Beth said...

Good luck :) And give that adorable baby a big kiss!!

Ouiz said...

THANK YOU BOTH!!! I needed them, and your prayers were answered. God bless you!

Ladybug Mommy Maria said...

Oh, Ouiz, I can soooooo relte and I good have written your post (in regards to myself)!

I will remember you in my prayers!

Hang in there, Mama!

I hope to get to confession tomorrow!

ThG said...

You're always in my prayers. You are an inspiration to me and to others in ways you can't know. I hope to chat with you soon. Just today you gave me a smile when in the grocery store I passed the goldfish, and remembered they were illegal artillery. I needed it because life has been anguish for me of late. Thanks!

Emily (Laundry and Lullabies) said...

There is a song that I sing to my kids at naptime called "Make Me A Servant". They like it, but I sing it to them because it reminds ME of what my job is!

Hang in there - I know that days like that are so tough.

Make Me A Servant

Make me a servant, humble and meek,
Lord let me lift up those who are weak,
And may the prayer of my heart always be,
Make me a servant, make me a servant,
Make me a servant today.

Ouiz said...

Thank you again for your comments... it's good to know I'm not alone!

Things got better yesterday, and today has been much better...

Emily -- we used to sing that at the PCA church I attended! I know that song well. Thank you for reminding me of it!

ThG -- sorry I couldn't IM this afternoon. PRAYERS FOR YOU!!!

Ladybug Mommy Maria -- thank you, thank you for your kind words. I hope you made it to Confession!