Did you ever have one of those days when you REALLY, truly, wholeheartedly didn't want to be around yourself?
Yeah, that was me today.
Too often I cruise on auto-pilot, thinking I'm pretty much A-OK. Not excelling in the holiness department, mind you, but basically getting a "satisfactory" grade all around.
And then there are days... days when I am so shocked, so revolted by the ugliness that still lingers that I wonder why anyone wants to be around me (let alone why God even bothers).
Today was one of those days.
I can't go into too much detail, for fear that it would hurt the feelings of those who know me who may read this, but let's just say that I thought I was a whole lot more... a whole lot bigger and better... than I really am. God in His infinite mercy didn't stage a huge "let's embarrass Ouiz-fest," but instead used several incidents over the last few days to show me -- as I saw and talked about the things that upset me most -- just how big my ego and pride had gotten.
And it's just not pretty.
I could try to wax poetic about the whole thing, but I think this commercial sums it up better than I ever could:
"Is that all you got, play-ah?"
"Unfortunately, yes. That's all you got."
Hysterically funny, and sums up what just happened to me spiritually better than anything else ever could.
Time for me to get off the dance floor and quit trying to impress others. There's only one arena that calls for my "greatness," so to speak, and that's my family. Trying to achieve it elsewhere looks as ridiculous as... well,... as this guy. [my kids, on the other hand, DO think I'm great and wonderful, and don't mind if I dance like this in the living room... but that's a different story]